Life Of A Rebel

Don't know what this is but here goes... The only silver lining I see right now in my life is my family which consists of my mum, sister and brothers. The rest? I can't make head or tails of anything...what I feel, what I think, what I even know. Walked into 2021 with so much energy and positive vibes but I barely made it out alive, I knew I just had to survive if not for myself or anyone else then for my mum. I could barely breathe, I didn't even exist I was just on autopilot from the first quarter to the very end. Coming into 2022, I'm tired, I'm drained, I can't even muster the energy to get out of bed. Worst part is how much anger I feel inside not at anything or anyone in particular but at everything...every damn thing. I'm realizing its an over accumulated thing, the anger I've had bottled up inside without so much as an outlet just the once in a while outbursts which I try to control so I don't seem crazy. I took care of a whole lot of people ...

November 23, 2018. He screamed then started wailing. "Why didn't you wait for me to go first?", he asked. Obviously no one had an answer for him, least of all me. I was dazed; dumbfounded would be too kind a word to describe it. The feeling of your heart being ripped right out of your chest, the pain and constriction in your chest region feels like the onset of a cardiac arrest which never really comes and it doesn't stop. No matter how much you wish it away, reality sets in when you dial all three of her numbers and it doesn't even ring, at that moment you realise its actually true. It isn't a prank! She's gone and she's not coming back, not in this lifetime; maybe in the next but for now she's gone, she's no more.  Telling ourselves its gonna be okay and then boom, life hits us with another unexpected bang! And I'm sitting here wondering, "WHAT IS THE TRUE MEANING AND PURPOSE OF LIFE? DOES IT REALLY GET BETTER? OR IS THAT JUST ANOTHE...

Hello Rebels, welcome back. I want to use this medium to really appreciate every single one of you, I don't take your love and support for granted. The official launch of the lifestyle brand Life Of A Rebel Inc was a huge success, the support was so massive it left my head spinning. I can't thank and appreciate you all enough, its been a crazy ride but it really was worth every single tears, sweat, sleepless nights, countless anxiety attacks and every ounce of energy that went into this project. I was really so exhausted yesterday I couldn't post an update but better late than never so here it is. An update on the previous post "My Story". After my first suicide attempt, a few days later we had a court hearing and I was to take the stand to testify to what the hell I knew not. Looking back on it now I can't help but laugh hysterically at how everyone the lawyers included kept telling me to be strong, they were trying to encourage me. Telling me what to say; ...

I just wanted it to stop, I wanted it all to STOP! As I picked up the kitchen knife, I stared at the icy steel blade and could see my reflection. In my reflection I could see the tears running freely down my face, I saw the fear in my eyes and in my eyes I saw her. I saw the little girl who all she wanted was the love and approval of her parents, the child who lost her childhood to violence, the girl who all she felt was hate and anger; at everything and everyone. This was the first of several to come, the beginning of wanting the end so badly. My name is Ada and this is my story. Growing up in a very conflicted background and an unconventional family was some may say 'bittersweet'; it was and has been one hell of a ride. I am the first of four kids and my parents were not the 'idle parents', they were actually too far from perfect they couldn't spell it. When a child grows up surrounded by violence he learns to fight, needless to say that I learnt to fight; I foug...

Hello Rebels, Greetings and welcome back to my blog. It's been a minute...a really long hot minute. The past few months since my last post have been ones I'd never forget or get over in a hurry. I've had the best reasons to laugh, smile and cry; all at the same time. A toast though is in order as I have finalized plans to launch my lifestyle brand Life of a Rebel Inc which would  be creating awareness about mental health and issues relating to it, also I'd be relaunching my clothing brand House of MBL Fashion and Beauty Empire; its been a long time coming and it's finally here. The unplanned months of break were in a way much needed but at the same time a heartbreaking loss in transmission cause I missed you guys terribly. How have y'all been? I know we have got a lot of catching up to do. One of the reasons I have been AWOL is that my Dad has been sick for some time now and I I have had to take care of him. He's suffering from Metastasis Carcinoma of the...

Hello Rebels, Welcome! Welcome!! Welcome!!! Thank you all for coming on this journey with me and sticking with me thus far, I'm everly grateful. . . . A lot of people look at me on a daily basis and go, "Girl, I wish to have your level of confidence" or "You're overly confident, that must be a good feeling. Not giving a care what people say or think about you, I wish I could be more like that." But what they don't know is that it wasn't always like that and sometimes it still isn't. Insecurities  have always been one constant in my life. Funny right? The badass queen of not giving a f**k had and still has insecurities? Well, go figure! Cause even the president of the world's largest economy has his own insecurities. President Trump is after all being trolled for being bald headed and going for a hair transplant. Being insecure which is synonymous with vulnerability isn't such a bad thing at all; it's something every living,...